__\::_screaming_for_mikey_:://["may"]

You returned from your parents'

five bed gaff in Milton Keynes

striped with poorly applied fake tan

that made your legs yellow

in sinuous crested textures

and with it during your

two week absence

you had begun to bind your

breasts beneath bandage

to androgenize yourself

had stuck in hair extensions

with great wads of visible adhesive

and we walked

the city in the

way we did then

and in the bath later you

sucked me off reluctantly

though just lipped the tip some really

and then held my cock next to

your cheek while you finished

me with your palm and fingers

rubbed the heft into your face

as though dowsing for nutrients

then had me come

in your eyes where I

watched it slaver down your face

and you seemed depressed

and wronged and

I looked about the bathroom

the institutional tones

and saw my beige boxers

clustered in a foul ball

on the sodden floor

the sun through the window glass

and felt absolute shame

at the boxers

the fact of their beigeness

their shameful beigeness

was in that moment intimate

with my own undesirability

your once wet cunt now not

and would bin them

first chance I got

a pointless symbol alluding

to changes well beyond my faculties.