I woke up to find three people eating my flesh. I thought they were my friends, and told them so.
"I thought you were my friends."
"We are mate."
"But I've just woken up to find you gorging on my flesh. Not only is it pretty odd, but it doesn't seem like an especially friendly thing to do. I mean come on guys, what's it all about?"
One of them took a big mouthful of my side and began to chew it thoughtfully.
"Try not to think about this too much," he said. "It's just something we like to do at weekends."
Bloody social cannibals.
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